Printable Version of Topic: Untitled
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| Posted by: mrchace April 18, 2006 12:07 pm |
| Prologue The boy, but 15 years of age, squinted as he took his first steps onto the ground of his highschool and the sun shone brightly into his eyes . Northbend High was a middle class school, it was in the center of a small town properly named as Woodstoke, on the eastern side of Florida. The boy was made up of an average build, he possesed brown hair medium in length and curly to the point of notice, he had green eyes that seemed to run forever. Sometimes if the light caught right, you could see yourself in them. The ride to school this morning was smoother then usuall, and the roads didnt provide the natural morning entertainment. It wasnt unusual to see people yelling at each other over car accidents, or backups at intersections. No, this morning was as tranquil as a pond high in the mountains. As the boy rounded the corner of what everyone called the red building, he was welcomed by a shriek "JORDAN!!!!!" And the next thing Jordan knew, His loving girlfriend Jessica was in his arms, his face widened as she kissed him on the mouth, he hugged her. She was wearing a skirt today, white with black pinstripes, it was quite small actually, it was about 3-4 inches from her knees. she was also wearing a hot pink tank top, that somehow she managed to make school appropriate. her dark brown hair lay straightened on her head and to the sides of her face, she stood a few inches shorter then Jordan, well maybe a little more then that. Her brown eyes looked at him with loveing interest. They had been going out for 2 years now, after recieving her liscence, she decided to abandon her school and head to his, she still lives where she used to, she just makes a 21 minute drive to school everymorning and Jordan loved her for it "Goodmorning" he said smoothly "Goodmorning" She said in her never failing cute voice As if it was even possible his smile could get even wider, it did, they stood their in each others arms for but a few more moments before deciding to go find someone to talk to, she grabbed his hand as the walked, the headed through the left entrance of the gym halls, emerged before the media center and took a quick left through the grass, and before them lay many many benches, that was where the lunch room was, off to the left. This was their meeting spot Standing there was Jordan's best friend Brandon, his long brown hair hanging over his face as he leaned over his breakfast, he was wearing a yellow Tshirt and blue denim shorts "Ellie!!!" As Jessica's voice rang out in the morning, silencing the birds, Ellie stood up from behind where brandon was sitting to give Jess a hug. Jordan looked at brandon, and they both laughed Jordan grabbed his cell phone from his pants pocket, it was a Verizon flip phone, it could take pictures, video, and send them through email, He flipped the phone open and checked the time, 8:20am, they still had 20 minutes before school started, and 15 before dispersing to their morning classes. When Jess returned to Jordan's side, he grabbed her hand, and the 4 of them stood their, telling some gossip, laughing at people, talking about teachers. ________________________________________________________________ Comments? yes, no, maybe tomarrow? I dont know what im going to do with this story yet, i can feel its going to be good |
| Posted by: Nikku April 18, 2006 07:49 pm |
| cool, but where are the zombies |
| Posted by: mrchace April 18, 2006 10:45 pm |
| Not here yet |
| Posted by: DavidRoxZoRs April 19, 2006 11:30 pm |
| Love it man, is Jessica that girl you are gonna ask out? But anyways, I love it (maybe you shoukld put nanother friend... *cough* me *cough* and the girl I like name: Katja german name) I didnt say anything, but feedback.. Edit: meant feedback not freedback duh, and i was jking about the thing in ()'s unless you want to |
| Posted by: mrchace April 20, 2006 02:06 am |
| Part 2 Jordan "JORDAN!!!" I winced as my name echoed through my head. I was thinking about what had happened yesterday, those accidents on the news, it was all everyone was talking about at school. "JORDAN, ARE YOU THERE!?" Again i winced at the intensity of her voice in my ear. "Im sorry, i just...i just cant...." I stammered "Cant what?" She asked? "I just cant stop thinking about whats been going on lately..." I answered "Oh...those...accidents you mean..dont worry about it, it would never happen to us" She assured me "yeah, i know, but i just cant shake the feeling that there is more to this then is apparent" There was much more to this. Its not every day when someone is left on the street half eaten. no, there was more to this then anyone knew, but there is nothing i could do about it, not a damn thing, "Your to young" everyone will tell me "What can you do?" they will say "Jordan, im talking to you" Her voice sounded so far away, as if it were coming from behind me, in the doorway "Im sorry baby, i'll try and pay attention from now on" ***************************************************** The class bell rang "So that is why you can never mix Sodium Citrate, and Carbon4, no homework, study for your test, get out of here" The teacher said as if people were paying attention As we crowded out of the class room i bumped into one of my closer friends kyle Now kyle, this man is...well you could say "Unique". He has black hair, medium in length, that lay somwhat curly on his head, he wore today his A7X Shirt, there really wasnt much to it, just Avenged Seven Fold written in Torn white letters over a skull with batwings, not eagle wings...BAT wings. Now this boy, he was one of those boys who thinks its special to wear girls pants, now, he is my close friend, that doesnt mean im going to respect him for wearing 0/3s. "So are we still on for the movies friday?" He asked "I dont know man, did you hear about those accidents on the news the other day?" I asked him stupidly "....are you stupid? thats all everyone has been talking about, theres nothing to be afraid of, its just one body" Just as kyle finished his little speech, a womans voice could be heard over the intercome "Teachers and Students, This is not a drill, i repeat, this is not a drill, Teachers and Students, we are under a lockdown, code red, Everyone get to the closest class room possible" the announcment replayed itself several times. I wasnt listing, my only thought, the only thing that was going through my mind was her, i needed to find her, i needed to make sure she was ok I ran through the halls looking for her, ubeknownst to the fact that she was doing the same thing. __________________________________________________________________ I hope you guys like it so far |
| Posted by: Security Corporate April 20, 2006 04:21 am | ||
Nikku, get some patience. Anway, sweet job so far Chace. Putting yourself in your story I see? The school scenario is really interesting. Just slow it down some. The lockdown was pretty suspenseful too. My only quip is the grammar. Does WordPad come with Spell Checker and other fix-its? Because that'll help. |
| Posted by: mrchace April 20, 2006 08:23 pm | ||||
I wish |
| Posted by: DavidRoxZoRs April 20, 2006 10:41 pm |
| I liek it, but you didnt talk about the "accidents" in your first post... so its kinda random |
| Posted by: KrazyFoYou1243 April 20, 2006 11:18 pm |
| Nikku not everything is about zombies!!!! |
| Posted by: mrchace April 21, 2006 11:10 am | ||
The second post takes place a few days later, its not specifically mentioned but let it be known that it does |
| Posted by: mrchace April 22, 2006 03:47 pm |
| Part 3 [Jordan] I soared high above the clouds for what seemed like eternity, thoughts provoking my every action, i was attracted to the thing, like light to flies, i didnt know what it was, and as i got closer, its features revealed themselfs to me, at first i could tell it was a humanoid, then as i got closer, i could see a girl, the closer i got, the more i could see, dark brown hair over her face blocked me from viewing the unknown. now i was inches away from her, i reached out to lift her hair from her face, she jerked and her hair flew back. it was jess, her face rotten, lips gone, teeth showing, missing part of her cheek. she jumped on me and toar the flesh from my bones, the only thing going through my mind was; there is no pain, why isnt there any p-a ________________________________________________ The pavment, hard as hell on my back, was the first thing i remember being consious of was the fact i wasnt in my bed, god knows what is was doing on the pavment, sleep walking perhaps, maybe even pass out but.... Then the reason why i was here rushed back in my brain as if it were one giant wave of memories, i was up in seconds, how i got down, i still didnt know, but now there was no one around, not a soul could be seen within the confines of the buildings surrounding me, i took a few steps forward and yelled "IS ANYONE HERE?" The only answer was me echo, asking me the same daunting question. "HELLO!" I screamed again, and i continued screaming, untill my voice was horse, and my throat burned for something to drink, my thoughts were flying in out out of my mind like crazy, i couldnt catch one of them, the only one obvious to me was what if there is no one else? what if the world is gone, what if...what if they are all...dead if i used that thought as a compass, i knew it would be leading me to nowhere fast, so i lost it quick, as if it would fully go away, but, i knew that it would only be temporarily disabled I could feel tears burn in the back of my eyes, i felt so helpless, so, discarded as i stood in the middle of what they called the blue commons, just a square room with one exit to my left and right that lead to hallways to different building, the windows that show the outside lay behind me, and infront of me, there is another double sided door that leads to another hallway, and through the windows on the door, i could see someone, walking, no, stumbling towards me, were they hurt? I pulled the doors open and walked to him, this reminded him of his dream, the person's face could not be seen, i could clearly tell it was a man, and as he stumbled towards me, blood dripped from where i hoped his face was, he dragged his feet through the puddles he mad, his hands out beside him, using the wall and lockers to steady himself I stood there in shock, unable to move, unable to breath, unable to think, i was compleatly helpless, i prayed to whatever holy spirit there was, "please, tell me this thing is human please" As the thing lifted his head up, i could tell he was clearly human, but his face was badly decade, as if he had been buried for months, his jaw lay loose and ascrew, his hair, brown in color, lay flat but ascrew on his head, the thing was wearing a brown jacket unzipped with a led zepplen shirt underneath, he wore blue jeans such as i did that day, he also woar a belt with a belt buckle ((imagine that)) i thought, comical relief to a situation that needed it It was feet from me now, it let out a low hair raising moan as its secret urges were about to be fullfilled i finnaly regained my existance, turned around, and bolted it, i dont think i had ever ran faster in my entire life, i ran through the double doors, out the doors on the sides of the windows, and down the sidewalks to the left no cars lay in the student parking lot, not one, it seems the evacuation was compleat, and they didnt leave anyone behind, but i guess that goes without saying that the cars could have been stolen, and, freshmen, sophmores, and some juniors, dont even have cars at school. Jessica The thought of her had burned itself into my mind and her faced flashed before my minds eye as i remember her. shit, shit, shit, what if shes dead? what if shes one of those things? I began to panic, it wasnt supposed to be like this, the one and only thing i have ever really loved, gone. like that, flash before the universe, instantly blinked out, then, the others flooded into my mind Brandon, Elli, Kyle, Cody, Lisa, Megan, Olivia ((at this i laughed)), Liz, Jen. all of them...dead? Mom, dad...are they gone to? what am i going to do. this time the tears came, and a lot of them, my faced burned red, i knew i was going to be doing alot of this over the next few hours I turned around to see if i was being followed, and as if my running did not detour the monster enough, it still followed me, it still shambled towards where i stood, wishing to fullfill the urges that would never ceese. I felt like giving up right there, i felt like just ending it, it wasnt worth the pain, what if i did see them dead, like the beast making its way up the path, A figure appeared behind the beast, the thing suddenly fell to the ground as if its fatigue had gotten a hold of it. The figure stepped over it and walked towards me as if nothing was going on, as if he was going to shake my hand and say hello. |
| Posted by: Security Corporate April 24, 2006 08:05 am |
| So wait, the zombie was shot?  I hope the person saving him is not there to "clean up" the mess. I also hope he's not an insane person that shoots or rapes you if you don't do as your told!  |
| Posted by: mrchace April 24, 2006 11:51 am |
| Part 3 [Jessica] The ladies voice echoed through my head, i could feel tears in the burning my eyes, what was going on? where is Jordan? Is he ok? what about Ellie? Brandon? These were the only friends i truly knew, these were the only friends i wanted to know, if anything happened to them...i dont know what i would do I took a step forward to run, when a teacher grabbed me by the arm and dragged me into their class. "LET ME GO! NOW!" I screamed and flailed around, the teacher, Mr Finneli some called him, dragged me in without a word, he shut the door, locked it, flipped the lights off and demanded silance. I had to get out of here, i had to find them, i had to make sure they were ok, i needed to make sure they were ok. im going to die just sitting here. as if to trigger an event, somethings face slammed up against the window of the small rectangular classroom, some of my peers screamed, some jumped up from their desks, others had a look of shock on their face, and as i looked over to see why everyone was so scared of what hit the window, that look of shock came over my face as well. It appears as if someone had run into the window so hard that blood was left in the place of the face, the body slowly slipped out of sight towards the ground. people gasped and started wispering "Everyone QUITE DOWN!" Mr Finneli Commanded Another scream was heard, but this time, it wasnt from one of my peers in the class, it came from outside, it was followed by another, then another, the next thing we knew, the lady was at the announcments "Police are standing by the evacuate all students, please wait for the police to knock on the door before evacuating, i repeat Polic--" the announcment was interupted by a gunshot, followed by another, and another. what was going on? tears burned down my face, i felt helpless here, i needed to know about them, i needed to make sure they were allright a knock at the door, everyone rised from their seats "Sit Down" Finnelli Commanded again we did so, he walked to the door, and peeked through the little window, makeing sure it was an officer, finneli went to open the door, when it was pushed open with such a force it threw him over his desk. what came through that door, no living human can discribe, whatever they were, jumped on the students in the front, ripping their flesh from their bodies, spraying blood everywhere, everything was quite, i could see people scream, but i couldnt hear them, i knew i should do something, but i just stood their, watching my classmates eaten alive. someone grabbed my hand and pulled me hard towards the door, i followed willingly, still unable to comprehend the event that just took place, Next thing i knew, i was in a car, speeding away. i looked out the window, all i saw was chaos, people running and screaming, followed by those things, the occasional building on fire, some building had their windows and doors boarded. I looked around the inside of the car, I was sitting in the front seat, they wear leather, the dashboard had a Electronic Map System, a Radio, a Sterio. A Police officer sat next to me in the driver seat. He was young, 20 or 21, his blond hair brought out his ice blue eyes, he wore his uniform, his shiny gold badge told everyone this man protected the law We turned a corner fast, slamming me against the door. "W-h-o...w-h-o...w-h-o a-r-e y-o-u" i stummered He looked at me, checking the road every few seconds "Your in shock, you shouldnt be talking" There were apsolutaly no thoughts in my head, should i be crying? should i be angry? i didnt know what to feel, so i layed my head against the glass, and slept |
| Posted by: Nikku April 24, 2006 08:40 pm |
| nice story, and too you 2 shut the hell up, its was obvisouly a joke to all the people who go like "Were are the zombies" in storys. dont make me add sacrasism tags. awesome story |
| Posted by: Security Corporate April 25, 2006 01:00 am |
| Yay, the a copper was able to save her! Here's some advice: be more descriptive of what happened. A cop dragged her through the door, but weren't there hoards of zombies right there too? |
| Posted by: mrchace April 25, 2006 09:38 pm |
| Ah bus SC, thats the point, i leave those moments to your imagination, this is 3rd person LIMITED, hence, the author only knows the thoughts and desires of one person. and doesnt show what the person doesnt see. so if shes passed out, or forgets, then that part of the story wont be told either ever or later in the story |
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